Tag Archives: Obligation

Just Say No!

4 Feb

“Your only obligation in any lifetime is to be true to yourself.” -Richard Bach

As kids of the 80’s we’re all familiar with the anti-drug campaign “Just Say No!” And it’s so simple right – if it’s something you don’t want or better yet is harmful for you, you should simply say No. But in reality how many of us end up doing things that we’d rather not be doing because we just have a hard time saying no. I cannot tell you the countless committees I’ve signed up for, lunches I’ve attended and money I’ve spent because I agreed to something against my better judgment. Why do we do this to ourselves? We are just piling on extra work  or spending extra money which in the end just brings extra stress. And when we are driven to do something simply because we believe that we should, it often breeds resentment. Think about it: Are you more likely to accomplish a goal when you truly want to or when you are doing it for someone else? It’s much easier to feel content and productive when you have internal inspiration driving you. No one likes doing something just because they think they should. The next time you are faced with accepting or declining an offer, think through these 3 questions:

  1. Is this something I want to do – This is pretty simple. If you ask yourself if you truly want to do something and all you hear back is a resounding ‘NO!’ then you have your answer
  2. Is this something I have the ability to do – Sometimes we may want to do something but financial or time constraints may be holding us back.  If doing something for someone else will break the bank or add unwanted stress to your life, don’t do it.
  3. What is the outcome if I perform the request –  Will you feel annoyed with yourself for allowing yourself to be talked into something once again? Then you may have to politely decline.

Take “I should” or “I have to” out of your vocabulary and replace it with “I want to.” Don’t feel guilty for being selfish with your time and energy. You need to spend your time and energy doing the things that you want. You are fully within your right to just say No.

Until Next Time,

Nailah

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